A Ghost of Christmas Past

Tonight I received the best Christmas gift ever from a ghost of Christmas past.

My dad passed away 15 years ago, but tonight I read, for the first time, love letters he wrote to my mom starting back in 1978.  They were originally discovered a couple years ago when my mom’s health was declining.  I tucked them away, along with some old photographs.  When my mom passed away just over a year ago, I searched high and low for that package but couldn’t find it anywhere.  Yesterday, I found the box in my craft room, and as God would have it, they surfaced at the perfect time. 

The love letter writing started when my parents went to a Marriage Encounter weekend, a program designed to open up communication and strengthen relationships.  It was a genuine blessing for my parents.  My dad was a man of few words, and my mom didn’t have much of a filter.  This weekend sparked the beginning of much positive dialogue, and a deepening of love between the two of them.

Reading these tender words from my dad to my mom is priceless.  Each letter starts with a Marriage Encounter question that he chose.  One letter that struck me, had this question across the top of the page…

            If money were no object, what would you want for Christmas?

My dad basically wrote that he had given it a lot of thought and he couldn’t think of anything that he really wanted for himself. This alone says a lot about my dad.  He was a humble, simply happy soul.  He goes on to say that if he had more money he would like to give it to the needy, as there are so many in need in our world.  Then he finishes with this…

“Oh – I would like a card, from people that know me, saying these three words, ‘I Love You’.  If I got this, I would have everything, now and forever.”

Love.  That’s it.  To love and be loved, that’s what all human beings need. 

Now think of all the people in your life that you love.  Tell them.  Tell them now.  If not now, when?  Don’t be selfish with your proclamations.  If you feel it, say it. Say it even if it feels weird.  Write it in a love note.  Send it in a text.  Whatever works.  After reading my dad’s love note I immediately started texting some people that were on my cell phone’s recent text feed.  It felt like a good place to start.  There’s a song from my childhood that comes to mind with the lyrics “Love is something if you give it away, you end up having more”.  So true.  I received all sorts of responses back.  Lots of love, a lunch date with an old friend, and one “I actually really needed this, thank you.” 

I’m not done.  I never will be.  Giving and receiving love is what it’s all about.  These poignant love letters warmed my heart tonight.  My dad was pretty special.  I can’t wait to read more, fresh box of tissues in hand.  

Thanks for the Christmas gift dad.  I feel you.  I love you.